I think I mentioned to you guys in a previous post that I really do live my life according to the things that I've been talking about in this blog so far. And for the most part, I think I'm doing a pretty good job. In fact things go pretty well for me emotionally. Pretty well-rounded guy over all. But… Not always! And this weekend happens to be one of those weekends where the irrational thoughts and the negative self statements just grew and grew and GREW! They started out harmlessly enough, cute and cuddly little self statements like, "Hm. I really want to get these daybeds completed for my boys this weekend." That's harmless enough right? Sorta like little Audrey II, at the beginning...
Isn't she just such a little cutie!?! But you can imagine what those self statements turned into by the time this was the daybed condition by the end of the weekend…
Well despite how cute and cuddly that first self statement was about getting these monsters completed, it soon morphed into beastly self statements such as, "Darn it! I've got to get these things done!" (and of course I got the icky facial expression to go with it as I'm saying it to myself!). Add to my building woes, the fact that I am a fairly staunch Cardinals fan! MAnd, as I'm sure many of you are aware, my beloved Cardinals are once again in the World Series!
And from there, it degenerated into a litany of negative self statements and irrational thoughts!
"Crap! I didn't finish those blankety-blank beds! That sucks!"
"Crap! I'm going to be so busy this week, there is no way I'm going to ever get these things finished! That sucks!"
"Crap! Why did Wong run!?! That was wrong of Wong! That sucks!"
"Crap! The Cardinals really needed to win game 4! But they lost! That sucks!"
You get the picture. My sweet little mostly harmless, cute, and cuddly self statements at the beginning of the weekend had turned into this monstrous and unwieldy negative self-talk that was definitely frustration-inducing! Little Audrey II had become BIG Audrey II and she wated blood...
But fear not everyone, I did get to a point where I realized what I was doing to myself. Of course I didn't realize it until I'd given myself a massive headache from frowning so much! And when I realized it, I stopped saying all those irrational things to myself and replaced them with things that were more rational and true, such as
"I didn't get those two daybeds finished this weekend but I actually enjoy working on them and it is a pretty huge project!"
"It's going to be a busy week, but there's always next weekend! And it's not like the boys are sleeping on the floor right now! Well..."
"Wong ran. Get over it."
"Yes, the Cardinals lost game 4. But the fact of the matter is, that just means the series is tied 2-2! And that's pretty exciting!"
I replaced all those negative self-statements and irrational thoughts with ones that were more rational and, most importantly, true! It's incredibly important that we use only true statements when we are replacing our irrational thoughts. Because if we don't replace them with statements that are true, we set ourselves up for more upset in the future! For example, I could've said "I'm going to finish those daybeds tomorrow"! Which I know is not true and I would have been all the more upset when I didn't finish them tomorrow!
So that's enough for now. That brings us to our 4th thinking error: Very Negative. You notice only half-empty glasses and ignore all the positive features in your life. You make unrealistically gloomy predictions about the future as well. You use words like "empty, doomed, and hopeless."
Okay, that being said… Good night to you!
Remember: ***** If you have questions, comments, or challenges please feel free, no, feel encouraged, to post in the comments section below! Oh, I accept positive feedback, too! I'm just kind like that. 😉
I am so enjoying this blog. Thanks for sharing, Saz!
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